Pain anniversary!


November 11, 2013


Yesterday was the second anniversary of the first lung surgery. Was occupied for the whole day a particular thing so just remembered it the evening. That surgery was extremely painful. It’s not common to have surgery on both lungs at the same time. Later came to know that in the history of that big hospital I was the first to have that kind of surgery! It was eight hours long. The lung which had the first operation was shut down. After that when it started functioning second one was shut down and the operation was done on it. It was very risky. At that time had to depend on the wounded first one! And can’t hurry to operate. My surgeon checked and felt every tiny nodules locate and operate! On CT scan there were ten nodules. My surgeon took out 22/23 nodules! Among those eleven were positive for sarcoma.

That surgery was the beginning of long painful journey. Even though the long painful life was already started when I had the surgery on my leg for sarcoma! Modern medical science has developed a lot. But treatment depends a lot on statistics. Which medicine, how effective, what types of possible side effects are there etc. depends on statistics. Most of the studies are done on White, Black and Hispanic people. Asians (Indian subcontinent) are few in the study cases. While I was complaining about drugs to my pain management team, they were saying, “It shouldn’t happen.” Because the study doesn’t say so! My surgeon was on odd duty for three days right after my surgery day. That was the main problem! The head of the pain management team was a senior professor. Think it was hard for him to agree with a patient like me! After my surgeon came back he took over the control and appointed his partner to deal everything. But it took eight days to control my severe pain! Didn’t sleep for eight days! And also the body went through such horrible experience along with surgery’s effect! Had the hallucination effect for couple of months! Had pretty nasty experience even though never took drugs, opium or any substances in my life! Told Deepto at the hospital, “Why do people take drugs?”

If I had the surgery a year ago, my rib cage would have to be opened! There was a new technique in 2011. They opened my back. Since I had surgery on both of my lungs, I have big cuts on right and left of the back. I had to lay down on my back with those big cuts! In the hospital for eleven days I was in a position between laying and sitting! For at least three months I had the dream to lay down on my sides! I couldn’t turn on my sides! Both sides had big cuts! Still think that I am lucky to get surgery with the new technique! Otherwise would it be possible to had the surgery again just after fifteen months!

After just two and a half month I was asked to recite a poem in the Bangla cultural program. It was even hard for me to just go and watch the program. At that time I couldn’t even talk for two minutes! Get out of breath, start wheezing, coughing. That I recited Rabindranath Tagore’s poem for five minutes without coughing! Nobody understood my exact condition, people told me later! From this September I started taking Yoga class for one hour on Saturday’s. I can do everything except exercise! I will try to do everything except this one! A couch potato like me is doing Yoga! The substitute teacher in the last class told me, “You are very flexible.” Later said again, “You are too flexible.” I almost said, “A couch potato like me?” Wish I could start taking Indian classical dance classes!